vacuum

it’s not the vacuum kind of miss anymore

the kind that is overwhelming and encompasses everything and sucks onto all of it

it’s the flower growing in the crack of the rock miss

a constant

but i’m not dependent

miss

a my life keeps going

yours does too

and

we don’t have each other in it

i know i don’t know really what makes her laugh what gets her brain spinning

i know she doesn’t know the times

the love is

so much bigger

than me

&the things i’m proud of

and ashamed of

and that miss

hurts

but not in a new way

in an old

now familiar

way